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;void(0)) Dear Mr. VanSluytman, I read your April newsletter about the Native American boy and school violence, and felt your emotion in it. I’m a Christian and a parent. I felt pretty much as you did. I believe that our children are too wrapped up in guns and violence. Have you ever considered writing a book on teaching our children peace and spirituality? I heard that yoga and meditation has been helpful with kids suffering with ADHD and other behavioral problems. Bible stories don’t seem to get through to them, and neither do other religions’ stories. What do I do? Ms. B. Dear Ms. B. My original hard copy version of the Aton Project contained little tidbits of information on child-rearing (“Parenting A-Z”). I don’t think that I could write a book on child-rearing. It would be too complex and extensive an enterprise. Besides, I’m not an expert in that area. The best advice I usually give parents is that kids usually watch what we do, they rarely listen to what we say. We cannot separate parenting from the way that we live our lives from day to day. If we try to do that we become manipulative and hypocritical. My best advice in child-rearing is no advice at all. It’s not important that we create an artificially peaceful environment for our kids. What’s important is that we continue on our journey of self-enlightenment. Having gone through the single parenting experience myself I know how difficult it could be trying to teach our children, especially boys, about genuine peace and tranquility. As I stated in the April edition, part of the reason lies in the socio-cultural conditions of our time. When my son was in the fourth grade I gave him Herman Hesse’s “Siddhartha” to read for a book report at school. You wouldn’t believe the negative reactions we received from his teacher and a friend’s parents. His friend told him that his parents regarded the book and the philosophy of Buddhism to be a form of “devil worship” (though they’d never read the book). Part of the reason for this reaction is the fear we have of the unknown. Once we truly understand that we are all part of the religion of the world we can all laugh hysterically at how much of our defensive and violent reactions come from our fear of what we do not comprehend. Life is competitive and violent every time we eat something or walk across a lawn. The amount of blood that has been shed over religion is quite profound. The Bible and other Holy Books tell of the great battles waged against “nonbelievers”. We can relax and live a life of serenity, reason and joy once we stop trying to make life into a Sunday school class. True Spirituality should make us broader and more flexible; more able to handle any situation anywhere, because we accept the entire world as it is. Our kids are a great way of showing us we cannot rely on our expectations and plans. Instead of giving our children heavy philosophies, we can show them – through example – a light-hearted dignity that can carry them through anything they ever have to face. If we’re a living example of light-hearted justice, courage, temperance, and prudence, who needs to preach to the choir? P.S. This lady was kind enough to give me permission to share her letter and response with all of you. Please e-mail me. Let me know if you want your letter shared with the Aton family or not. Due to the volume of e-mail we may not be able to put all of your comments on the site. Thank you, S.A. VanSluytman,LCSW Newsletter Directory The Aton Project - Home Page Tony VanSluytman info Tony VanSluytman - the Author | Return Home | The BOOK DOCTOR | The BANYON NETWORK | The Banyon Buzz Newsletters | The Aton Project Newsletters | Contact Us | |
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