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;void(0)) I’m from a large family of siblings; cousins; aunts and uncles. My earliest memories are of Big Christmas gatherings consisting of gifts; music; and good food. I have to say without a doubt that Christmas is my favorite time of the year. Quite frankly, I doubt that I would ever experience Holidays on the scale of those that I experienced when I was a child – many of those responsible for those times have passed away – but I do have the precious memories to cherish. Over the years I have noticed that not everyone has the good fortune of celebrating this time of the year the way that my family did. I have worked in prisons and in psychiatric facilities over the years. As a psychotherapist I am fully aware that for many people, Christmas could be a pretty miserable time replete with depression, anxiety and, often some hostile developments. When we start telling ourselves that we MUST or SHOULD have a great time over the Holidays we are really telling ourselves that there’s something wrong with us or the rest of the world if it does not always turn out to be so Merry. Some of us tend to overindulge or overspend or set unrealistic expectations for ourselves and others, only to find ourselves depressed and frustrated when it’s all over with and we’re hit with the bills or if the Holidays just don’t turn out the way that we expected it to be. We demand that all goes the way it’s supposed to go and if it does not turn out the way Madison Avenue tells us it should we become terribly upset. Sure we would prefer that the Holidays turn out to be GREAT and feeling GREAT is better than feeling BAD, but wouldn’t it be better to just feel good? Feelings have an essential cognitive component to them. They are grounded in how we find the world and how we judge matters. Extreme emotions can be avoided by deciding to withhold our assent to the effect that anything good or bad is happening to me. If I do not judge or believe that I must be happy because it’s the Holidays then I won’t get overly ecstatic and blow minor incidents out of proportion. All of the gifts and eggnog in the world cannot provide us with genuine joy. That can only be found within, and that joy only comes from rational thinking and the calm, serene life style that flows from that. A “Walking Meditation” is a life free of unreasonable demands. We are aware of what is in our control and what is not. We are able to deal with life’s ups and downs with relative equanimity. We experience life to its fullest with a clear rational mind. This is similar to the practice of sitting meditation, but we are fully involved in every aspect of our real life situations. Sitting meditation becomes a kind of exercise for the real struggle of everyday existence. Just as extreme emotions are anathema to meditation, extreme emotions can be disturbing in the actual practice of wise and prudent living. This Holiday Season I wish you and yours peace and serenity in these turbulent times. I hope that you are able to face the good or bad of the New Year with the noble virtues of prudence, temperance, courage and justice. Newsletter Directory The Aton Project - Home Page Tony VanSluytman info Tony VanSluytman - the Author | Return Home | The BOOK DOCTOR | The BANYON NETWORK | The Banyon Buzz Newsletters | The Aton Project Newsletters | Contact Us | |
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